You could kidnap my wife, and she’d be in the trunk of your car shouting that you’re following the car in front of you too closely.
I always like to find the humor in things, for example, my Social Security check!!
I received a request to post the following
The apartment on my farm will be available for the first time in nearly six years as of April 10. For Information, please call 6931-1129.
Por primera vez en casi 6 años, el apartamento en mi finca estará disponible a partir del 6 de abril. Para mayor información, estoy a sus órdenes al 6831-1129.
Pour la première fois depuis presque six ans, l’appartement chez nous dans notre domaine sera disponible dès le 10 avril. Renseignez-vous au 6931-1129.
I keep messing up my diet with my desire for real food.
Cats…Because you can never have enough rejection in your life. Dogs… When you have had enough rejection.
Logic says the screw I dropped should be somewhere by my feet, but experience says it’s under the couch in the other room.
The easiest way to see the various stages of life is to walk down the cereal aisle at the grocery store.
I went to the hospital for a stress test. They hooked me up to the machine and made me watch Lilliam parallel park my car.